cancer blog
The Story So Far
From finding the first lump through diagnosis, treatment, surgery and recover – the complete story in one place.
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End of Act I
We are now twelve days since the surgery. Or, to give it its proper dramatic title: The Slicing. Sleep the night before had been aspirational rather than actual. We were ready far too early, hovering around the house like anxious labradors. The taxi wasn’t due until 9:15. By 7:30 we were already wondering if we should just leave anyway.…
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The Waiting Game
It’s been a wee while since the last entry and no, I haven’t been abducted by aliens or fallen into a medical vortex. We were away for our annual four-week pilgrimage to Gran Canaria. Sun, sea, men in far too tight shorts and tees and just enough denial to keep me functioning. It was wonderful.…
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Battle (0): Cancer (1)
It’s taken me a few days to pull myself together enough to write this one. After another three-week wait, we returned to the scene of the crime to see Dr Lump and The Oracle. I was quietly optimistic. The lump had disappeared. I felt better. Stronger. Just the ongoing dry mouth, hoarseness and extreme tiredness.…
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Let’s try Again
So it’s PET scan attempt number two. Yet another day avoiding pregnant ladies. I kept imagining what I’d say if a pregnant woman sat beside me on the train home: “I’m sorry missus, but I’m radioactive, so I’ll sit over there. It’s not because you smell.” Obligatory weigh-in: Now 6½ stone down. WOOHOO. Another half-stone…
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Constant exhaustion
I am now back at work full time. I am TRYING to stick to Lessons 24, 25 and 26, but I am slipping back into my pre-Apocalypse work brain. I need to shake myself. A few weeks ago, I had three minutes to live, and already I am awake at 3am worrying about a very…
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The Longest 48 Hours In The History Of Time
I have now read the entire Cancer Research website on failed treatment. I had trawled the Macmillan forums for other people who had failed the chemo/radio exams. I now understood immunotherapy. I had mentally prepared for: a full neck dissection; tongue removal and; voice box eviction. I had researched the workplace ill-health retirement policy and…
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The Call
Normally I keep my phone off during meetings, but I had set my iPhone to MAX volume with a siren ringtone if the NHS called. I was in the middle of a Teams call when the siren exploded. It was someone from not on the character list telling me I needed to come in this…
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The Long Long LONG wait
To be fair, to Dr Lump didn’t realise how literal I take things. She said the results normally come in about a week and that I’d get a call. Like any good project manager, I built in contingency, five days plus 20% slippage before contacting The Oracle asking for a status report. Nothing. So I…
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Back To Work
My wardrobe hadn’t been updated since pre-Covid and I had finally accepted that the “round” silhouette only really works for snowmen and circus clowns. Now, having lost 5½ stone, not a single item fits. I’ve gone from XXL (42”) to L (34”). I caught myself in a shop window and, instead of seeing a version…
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The Big Scan
Things have actually been getting better and better. I can now walk for about 45 minutes without fainting, collapsing, or needing revived with a biscuit. The New Family Doctor has declared that I can return to work on a phased return, and Occupational Health have signed me off too provided I do less work and…